Free Range Nurse

Cooking therapy from a former travel nurse

Resolving To Be Patient January 11, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — freerangenurse @ 4:38 pm

Yesterday was a day of mixed emotions.  Looking back, I feel kind of ridiculous about the whole thing.  I went to the gym after working Sunday night to meet my gym buddy and fellow Weight Watcher, Eileen.  It was the big one week weigh-in.  I was pumped!  I just knew I had lost three pounds.  I’d been good all week, using only an average of 30.2 of my 40 allotted daily points, had only had one “skinny” Texas Martini at happy hour this week and had worked out six days out of seven!  I was walking tall and feeling good….until I stepped on the scale.  It turns out I lost 1.8 pounds.  I know, I should have been happy, right?  That’s what everyone told me, and I was…sort of.  Mostly I was disappointed and discouraged.  I mean, I was happy I lost, just not happy with the amount.

I don’t know how many of you know how Weight Watchers works, but basically, you are given a number of daily “points” along with a weekly allowance of flex points.  You can also earn activity points based on the type and duration of exercise you do.  These points are then traded for food.  Some foods are free (most fruits and veggies) and the rest have a points value based on the fat, protein, carbs and fiber content.  Choose wisely, young grasshopper, and you can stay full and satisfied while staying within your points.  This is exactly what I did.  I made conscious decisions to eat healthy foods and chose not to have the indulgences I usually allow myself.  I could have, for example, had a regular martini, or two at happy hour and definitely had the points accumulated for it, but chose to get the sugar-free option.  I could have stopped off at Starbucks before work and had a grande chai soy latte, but didn’t.  I only used my daily points and sometimes found myself well below them, albeit unintentionally.

My disappointment stemmed from a fear that if I ever did use all the points I’m allowed, that I would not lose, or worse yet, that I would gain!  I felt a little defeated and couldn’t seem to shake it.  The odd thing, is that where I might have given up and eaten something comforting (read bad for me), I instead ate almost nothing that day.  The nurse in me knows that any time you start a diet, or in my case a change in your normal way of eating, where you consume less calories, you convince your body to hold on to its stored fat.  I know this only lasts for a week or two before the ol’ body falls in line and realizes there’s a change in how it’s going to be managed.  I know this, and yet, I was devastated.

I am so thankful for my Facebook friends.  They, who have been cheering me on daily when I post about going to the gym or eating something healthy, were also there to pick me up yesterday and tell me to be strong and keep it up.  I’ll admit I whined excessively and I needed to have myself verbally bitch-slapped out of my mood.  So thank you to Eileen’s husband, David who told me I was done whining.  That I didn’t put the weight on overnight and I wasn’t going to get rid of it overnight.  Thank you to Frank, who reminded me what I already know about my body holding on to the calories that it thinks won’t be coming anymore (and they won’t, dear body, but we’re going to learn to live without as many of them).  Thank you to every “you can do it” and every “don’t give up” because, even though sometimes we think we stand alone, it’s nice to know that we don’t.


7 Responses to “Resolving To Be Patient”

  1. Wendy Says:

    Oh dear girl. Thank you for sharing your wise insights with us all. Here is my two cents- Are you crazy weighing in after staying up all night?!?! I used to do this back in my Jenny Craig phase. It is sometimes necessary, but almost impossible to get a weight loss. Consider any loss at these times a HUGE success, and wait until the next weigh in to get true results. And I know you know…don’t starve yourself. I know there is a range of points so always make sure you get the minimum, or you will seriously piss off your system. Oh, and way to go! Keep it up! We all believe in you!

  2. Mike Alves Says:

    It is a long race and down is down. I often lost only small amounts when I didn’t eat all of my points. Just be sensible and follow the plan. You can do it.

  3. Gretchen Polnac Says:

    Hang in there! You said you feel better and that you are making conscientious choices……….and a scale is just a scale.

  4. Thanks, everyone. I woke up today finding that the spring had returned to my step and the sun was shining inside me. I hit the gym and continued eating healthy and even had a “big” breakfast of egg beaters, turkey sausage, cheese and a piece of toast. Felt like the old days, but better! While I can’t promise I won’t ever feel defeated again, I do know that I can keep going. I read something on another blog that said, “I may not be as far along as I wanted, but I’m a lot closer than I would’ve been had I quit.” I’m going to keep that in mind for next time.

    • Diane Says:

      I love you, sister. You are the reason I signed up for this WW and I’ve been starving at 31pts a day, dipping into the weekly cuz I’m only supposed to have 29 and I haven’t been able to do that YET. I thought, this will be hard, but I’m not trying to lose much so I can do it and it will be great to have the community support and accountability so I;ve been diligently recording points (also came to terms with sudden, post-40 myopia trying to read the damn labels!) and I’ve been “atta-girl-ing” and trying to step up my workouts, too (to the point of back injury which didn’t help overall), I’ve even begun drinking enough water and taking all my supplements EVERY day…I mean everything but flossing!….and I finally get to Sunday weigh-in thinking maybe I’ve lost a pound, or even two……..nope……I’ve gained 1 pound!

      I am not discouraged. Now I’m just plain mad. I’m starving and I’ve GAINED a pound. So don’t feel bad; at least you’re moving in the right direction!

      Hang in here with me…we can do this. I really want to kick this thing in its ass now.

      • Same thing happened to my friend, Eileen! We just have to keep going and our bodies will fall in line. You’d think after I’d abused it for 39.5 years that it would appreciate my efforts to clean it up! My muscles aren’t speaking to me and nearly gave out on me after Zumba today, They will learn to behave. Diane, you are my goal, so don’t be so hard on yourself. I think you are beautiful, vibrant and healthy just as you are, but I am so proud of you for fighting to be where you want to be!

  5. Diane Says:

    btw I think my sister was right in worrying about the ‘free points’ foods…not that I’ve done this yet, but it is real tempting to load up on simple sugars from fruits and never tally the ‘points.’ I love fruit, and won’t starve myself of it, but I’m wary to not overdo those.

    At any rate, let’s be patient…this is only the first few steps of a very long road. 😉

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